Readjusted View

God never lets anything come to waste if we are willing to work with Him. In fact I do believe the Scripture that says He uses everything for good. My time outside of Catholicism was very productive. I learned a lot of things that I never would have learned inside the Church.

Even so, I worry many days that my boys are “behind” in Church related matters. Going to religion class has opened many new ideas up to them. But when I honestly look, in no way do I really see them as “behind.” Their foundation of faith is very strong and their knowledge base appears to be well anchored. I’m pretty sure they know as much, if possible not more of the Bible as their cradle Catholic counterparts. They are just getting filled in on the unique denomination issues that come with Mass and all that goes with being Catholic.

The fact that they know something outside of the Catholic Church may just serve them well in the future. So I need to trust God that He has it all worked out, that He will give the boys what they need and He was never surprised by any of their or my meandering journey to where we are today.

There are many times I am afraid my posting comes across as anti-anything not Catholic. And that is not what I ever intend. The written word isn’t perfect at conveying intent and body language and tone…and all that…yada, yada, yada…Especially when the writer is me. So, that is the long-winded way of saying, I hope you don’t think I regret my time in Protestantism. I hope no one feels I am mocking their beliefs or even looking for an argument. I am just hashing out online my journey.

Looking back I see I learned some things there I never learned in the Catholic Church. They might have been taught and it is possible I was passing notes or zoning, looking out the window, or shoving my sister in the pew (we only did that once—snort!) but I learned them outside the doors of the Church. They are, in no particular order:

To ask if something is a “salvation issue.” Doctrine, dogma, teaching, statements of beliefs. It never occurred to me to question, even if I had questions. I will also add I was the product of some wrong spiritual superstition teaching at the hand of my grandmother (and mother). What I’ve found returning is that there are people asking questions, questions are answered. Some things are debatable, some are not. I need to quit being so self-conscious and just say if I want to know something.

Learning about submission, to believe that indeed, my husband is the head of the household. Now I think this is something that is demonstrated daily in the Catholic Church with a very clearly defined hierarchy. So maybe it is implied and modeled more than I realized. But as a newlywed I was not a submissive wife. I’m probably not very good at it today. But I certainly learned that blessings flow when a wife allows her husband to lead the family. I still don’t see that always modeled well in families at church, but I do see a lot of men in the pews, men in leadership. But lots of women working and having important roles.

To read Scripture and to retain it is a treasure in times of need. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I read my Bible all the way through at least seven times more than I did in my early years growing up Catholic. That would be seven vs. never if you wanted to do the math. No one ever told me not to, but I don’t remember being encouraged to, either. But I did know a lot of the Bible just from the Scripture that goes throughout Mass. The Catholic Church has cycles so that the Bible is read on a rotation. Now I can take the words I knew and associate a chapter and verse with them. I can easily look up and quote. I am very, very grateful for this gift.

It’s okay to be emotional about the LORD. You don’t see many tears at Mass. You just don’t. I heard an “Amen” the other day though—‘bout fell out of my pew! I was always an emotional person. I would find myself every Palm Sunday fighting tears reading the Passion. I wanted to scream at everyone and ask if they didn’t see & hear what I saw and heard. I know there are just as many ho-hummers in the seats at other denominations as I thought I was dealing with back then. I know there were and are just as many passionate, emotional Catholics as me. It’s just taken me a while to see them.

It’s okay to lift up your hands when you pray. I have to say this—I was so surprised when I came back. The congregation was asked to raise hands to pray over and then lay hands on (if they so desired) the Catechumens near Easter. Guess there have been a few changes while I was gone.

Truth be told, I wonder that I wasn’t supposed to leave and come back. Maybe if I had made some better choices I would never have had to move from my comfort zone. But since I did I will continue to use the tools I was given, the gifts which bless me so much.
What have you learned as you’ve traveled?

~ by throughadarkglass on November 13, 2007.